Strife of the Party

No, not Cloud Strife. >.>

Before I begin, let me just say that I know not everyone likes Mario Party. A lot of people think it is a horrid, simple game for stupid little kids.

I recommend these people not Jump the Gun. It is a great game for kids. It is also a varied collection of fun minigames combined with a unique social board game. I like minigames, and I like board games. What's not to like? Oh yeah - the cutesy, family friendly presentation. Meh. Boo riding atop a ravenous Chain Chomp in order to mug Luigi is the epitome of G-rated cool.

The first Wii incarnation of the series, Mario Party 8, is Kart Wheeling its way to retail at the end of the month. Needless to say, Poptart, Keif, and I are Book Squirming with anticipation and have been gearing up for the new installment by playing the daylights out of the Gamecube iterations (4,5,6, and 7) to Rumble Ready ourselves.

Also during a recent move, the memory cards containing saves for the aforementioned installments were somewhat misplaced, so we've made it our mission to go through the various enumerations re-unlocking characters, minigames, and boards. It is an enjoyable, though sometimes tedious exercise, but we assuredly have had the Will Flower to persist.

I was psyced to finally get around to Mario Party 7, which was a game we initially dismissed soon after acquisition. As exuberant Button Mashers, we prefer the two-on-two party mode. Unfortunately, unlike the previous games, 7 forces your Dungeon Duo to move together around the board, which greatly limits the strategies inherent in occupying two spaces. This nerfing originally put us off 7, although I was quite enamored with it due to the addition of Birdo and Dry Bones as playable characters.

In every other game Mario was my avatar, as it was his party and there is an ongoing superstition that the bullshit randomness of Mario Party seems to favor the red plumber, seeing as it is his party after all. As bizarre as it may be, I vastly prefer the gender-bending, egg-spitting, bow-wearing Birdo in all his/her pinkness to the titular protagonist. In no small way is this due to Birdo's incredibly annoying taunt. Its likeness to someone beatboxing through a kazoo tends to put opponents on Full Tilt.

Much of 7's hidden content has to be unlocked through the Solo Cruise mode, a sort of one-on-one Smashdance against a CPU opponent wherein each board has a unique win condition. I found this to be a revelation and easily the most enjoyable aspect of the game, allowing for more intense and faster paced matches. Bowser's Enchanted Inferno and Pyramid Park are about a kerjillion¹³³⁷ times more fun in this mode than in Party Mode. (And I get to play as the Pink Wonder.)

In case you've been Fishing Upon a Star that your spirit guide to the Mushroom Kingdom will be an avatar in the upcoming Mario Party 8, a gander at Wikipedia's entry reveals some news; All twelve characters from 7 return plus (...Weight for it...) Hammer Bro. and Blooper (!!). The Capsule/Orb/Item system of the past seems to have evolved into a candy shop selling assorted confections that can transform your character, allowing them to navigate the board in new ways. And, in case you were wondering, apparently the board play is controlled with the Wiimote in the sideways NES orientation.

Additionally, Treasure Trawling the Wiki article reveals that the new boards include: DK's Treetop Temple (most likely having a stationary Star space), Goomba's Booty Boardwalk (Akin to Koopa's Seaside Soiree from MP4 supposedly), Koopa's Tycoon Town (Allegedly an interpretation of classic Monopoly), Shy Guy's Perplex Express (Revolving around a train motif, I guess), King Boo's Haunted Hideaway (With a haunted house theme), and the unlockable Bowser's Warped Orbit (Possibly a Star-stealing board a la Snowflake Lake, the Snow Whirled from MP6). 65 new minigames in all and some not-so-mini games like Table Menace, a ping-pong diversion. Apparently, as seen in a one Freeze Frame, Miis may show up in the background of some of the minigames, too.

As long as Birdo's there, I'm in.

Later Skaters. Piece Out.